You know those days when you have nothing to do, the weather isn`t friendly, everyone is busy and you don`t have any mood for doing anything but think and...think. I don`t know about your thoughts but mine are screaming really loudly in my head. It`s that day when not even music can distract my mind, working is not productive and socializing is just so boring today. It`s so hilarious and real; I woke up late, I carried my zombie body in the kitchen, I drank half of my morning coffee, I smoked two cigarettes, I checked Facebook with no lack of interest but just as a stupid daily routine and after that I went outside and play with my father`s dog, hoping that we can kill each other`s loneliness. With some playing and a bit fresh air I became "the walking creature". Where to go? To the store and buy some cigarettes, a perfect excuse to take a walk. I didn`t come to Romania, my home country for six months and after twelve days since I am here I can`t get used to so much speed, so many people, so many cars and so much noise. I was walking but I had the feeling that is just an impression of moving my legs in comparison with the city`s speed. Finally I got to the store where I waited five minutes, the lady was busy talking to her husband about their schedule for tonight and about how angry she is because her boss brought too many Philip Morris packs instead of bringing Marlboro. I was patient all this time, I was looking at her the entire time hoping that she will notice me. She was so upset and worried, not even a smile on her face or a spark in her eyes. She was so empty that after those five minutes she wasn`t a human anymore for me, she was just a living box. The lady noticed me, thank God and she told me: "Say!". "What a customer service is this?", I was wondering. And I continued in my head: "Poor box! When did you lose your manners?". I bought what I needed and I took the way back home.
The coffee is cold, I can`t drink it anymore, the weather is mean, I can feel the storm is coming but I don`t know when. The window is open in the kitchen and I can feel the wind to my ears, I can hear dogs barking and cars moving far away, a frog is upset somewhere in the garden and my thoughts are everywhere.
This is the day when I refuse doing anything, but making serious plans and taking decisions to please my consciousness, but doesn`t want to stop. I am not a box or a worried creature, but today I feel that everything is evil, my mind is punishing me for some reason and I think I know why: I miss so many things...but so many things have changed.
But tell me, do you recognize this day?